The quiet patterns that decide before we do A message came in on a Tuesday afternoon, and before I had finished reading it I had already begun typing my reply. Yes. Of course. Happy to. The request was reasonable — a favour, a little extra work, nothing out of the ordinary. What caught me was… Continue reading Have You Ever Said Yes When You Meant No?
Tag: emotional regulation
When Someone Else’s Version of You Gets Too Loud: Separating Feedback From Who You Are
There is a difference between hearing what you did and hearing who you are. One gives you something to work with. The other hands you a verdict — and the trouble starts when we mistake the second for the first.
Stopped Arguing With Reality
A messy week away with four kids, and the quiet realization that the mess didn't have to mean anything was wrong with me.
Knowing Better Doesn’t Mean Getting It Right Every Time: The Gap Between Awareness and Action
Knowing what to do doesn't guarantee we'll do it. A reflection on the gap between awareness and action — and why growth may not be what we assume.
The Moment Before the Anger: Where the Boundary Was Needed All Along
We notice the anger because it's loud. The decisions that preceded it were almost silent. A reflection on capacity, the quiet yeses, and the boundary that was needed several decisions before the reaction ever arrived.
How We Drift From Ourselves Under Pressure
We don't leave ourselves all at once. We drift — one pressured decision at a time — until a feeling quietly becomes the whole story of who we are. This week on Reflections, a quiet drive through Vermont and what it reminded me about coming home to myself. The question I came back with: who is the version of yourself you've stopped visiting?
A Feeling Is Not an Identity
A good day. An unexplained sadness. And the moment a feeling almost became an identity — until it didn't.
What Acceptance Really Means When Life Gets Hard
Acceptance is not giving up. It requires more honesty than pushing does. This week it showed up in the comparison I caught myself making, in the day I chose not to force it, and in the moment chaos arrived and I had to decide who I was going to be in it.
Why You Hesitate Even When You Already Know the Answer
You already had the answer. So why did you hesitate? Learn the real reason behind decision fatigue — and why pushing through never fixes the pattern.
How the Vagus Nerve Controls Your Stress Response — And How to Reset It
Most people assume hitting a wall mid-afternoon is just a bad day. It isn't. It is a nervous system that was never given a chance to reset. Learn what the vagus nerve actually does, why chronic stress depletes it, and how to begin resetting it — starting with one breath.
